Self–Concept Builders and Stealers
by Dr. Charles Fay| Builders |
Stealers |
| Focus on their children's strengths. | Focus on their weaknesses. |
| Expect their children to work for most of the things they want. | Give their children everything. |
| Set loving limits and expect their children to behave. | Are afraid to set limits. |
| Make discipline look easy. | Show frustration and make it look hard. |
| Show their children that arguing and manipulation doesn't work. | Get sucked into arguments and power struggles. |
| Guide their children to own and solve the problems the children create. | Rescue or punish. |
| Avoid lectures and repeated warnings. |
Use lectures and repeated warnings often. |
| Love their kids for who they are. |
Love their kids for what they do. |
©2001 Charles Fay, Ph.D.
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