One Year Plan
By Jim Fay
- Love and Logic parents remember that parents can't teach for teachers and teachers can't parent for parents. Remember that teachers and parents can't learn for kids no matter how much we love them.
- Show the same amount of love for your children regardless of their success in school.
- Show sadness rather than anger when they have trouble at school.
- Expect your children to do their share of the chores at home.
- Spend some time each day talking with excitement about your work and your day. They will want to imitate you and will soon begin to talk about school and their day.
- Take turns reading to each other every day.
- Have your children teach you something they have learned at school. Do this once per week.
- Encourage your children to do things that "charge their batteries." Encourage them to try many different activities as a way of discovering interests and talents.
Remind them that they will build their careers around their talents, not around their weaknesses.
- Provide a time and place for homework. Expect that they will study. Allow them to study either by writing the assignments or thinking hard about them for a reasonable amount of time.
- If they decide to study by thinking instead of writing or reading, have them think of a plan for explaining it to the teacher.
- Support the teacher in how they grade the assignment.
- Don't fight with children over the homework.
- Don't fight with the teachers over the grade or consequence.
- Tell your children that you will love them regardless of their grades or the number of years it takes to complete each grade.
- Don't pay your children for good grades and don't punish for bad grades. Be excited about the good grades and sad for the children about their bad grades.
- Have your children bring home papers.
- Look at the right answers instead of the wrong ones.
- Don't correct the wrong answers—leave this for the teacher.
- Have your children explain the reasons for the answers being right. If they don't know, give them three choices:
- You cheated?
- You tried hard?
- You are getting smarter in that subject?
- Expect this Love and Logic program to take about one year before you see good results. Remember that children who have a hard time at school need to get away from it for a while each day. More homework and problems at home about school won't help.
- Don't complain to teachers that they should give this child more homework.
- Use this program instead and you will see amazing results in one year.
- Fight with your children and their teachers about homework and the problem will still be there in years to come.
- Love and Logic parents remember that highly successful people put most of their efforts into their talents and maintain minimal standards on everything else.
Printer Friendly PDF
©1991 Jim Fay
Permission granted for photocopy reproduction.
Please do not alter or modify contents.
For more information, call the Love and Logic Institute, Inc. at 800-338-4065.
[ back to article index ]