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Love and Logic Parent's Playbook

By Jim Fay

Love and Logic parents are great sports coaches.

They go to their Love and Logic playbook when facing a challenge. Like great coaches, Love and Logic parents don't try to make up plays on the spot, but refer to their playbook. These plays may look different in different situations, but nevertheless, they are the same in their execution.

Great Love and Logic parents overlearn their plays so that they become second nature. This is only done when the playbook remains simple with a limited number of plays. The authors of Love and Logic have found that it is very difficult for a child to do something that cannot be handled with variations of the following plays.

Remember, perfect execution of a Love and Logic play does not guarantee that the child will always make a good decision. But the good news is that he/she will have an opportunity to learn from the resulting consequence.

  1. Lead with Empathy
  2. Uh, Oh Song
  3. One–Liners to Neutralize Arguing
  4. Enforceable Statements
  5. Choices
  6. Anticipatory Consequences/Delayed Consequences
  7. Restitution

Additional chores to pay for parent's time, energy, or worry:

  1. Child Pays for Baby–sitter or House Guard
  2. Strategic Training Session
  3. Guiding Kids to Solve their Own Problems