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Two Ways to Neutralize Childhood Arguing

By Jim Fay


1. Love and Logic Instant Empathetic Response

The expression of genuine empathy has the amazing ability to soak up emotions.

Learn to use an empathetic statement that comes right from your heart. Use the statement that feels natural to you. Use it every time.

Examples of empathetic statements that work:

  • "Oh, no. I bet that feels terrible."
  • "Wow. What a bummer."
  • "I can't imagine how bad that feels."


Examples of statements that don't work:

  • "I know how you feel."
  • "I know just what you mean."
  • "I understand."

 

2. Love and Logic One-Liners to Neutralize Arguing

It is important that Love and Logic One-Liners be used in the "broken record" form.

Example of a Love and Logic One-Liner that should become a habit for you:

"I love you too much to argue."

 Sample dialogue:

  • Child: You never let me do what I want.
  • Parent: I love you too much to argue about that.
  • Child: But Sally always gets to do what she wants.
  • Parent: I love you too much to argue about that.
  • Child: Yeah, that's cause you like her better.
  • Parent: I love you too much to argue about that. Come talk to me later about something fun. See you, sweetie. Thanks.

People who are really successful implementing this skill purchased Four Steps to Responsibility

 

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©Jim Fay
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