Thank you very much for teaching the Love and Logic class at Menlo Park Presbyterian Church. The parenting methodology my wife and I learned made an immediate and positive impact with our 3 year old daughter. It’s as if we finally found the parenting instruction manual we’ve been looking for. We've embraced the four basic principles of: 1) building the self-concept, 2) sharing control and decision making, 3) offering empathy, then consequences after bad behavior and 4) sharing the thinking and problem-solving. We love the method of offering choices as much as possible and do so all day long to share control when we can and then take control when we need to without resistance. Previously, getting our daughter to brush her teeth was a battle. Now we simply ask her if she “would like to brush her teeth with her pink tooth brush or her green tooth brush” and she gets excited to brush her teeth because she has a choice and is involved in the decision process. When walking around busy areas, I simply ask my daughter if she would “like to hold my left hand or my right hand.” At breakfast, I ask her if she would “like to have oatmeal or scrambled eggs.” When bad behavior occurs, the empathy-consequences communication works wonders. The simple “uh-oh” song is a gem of a technique in its ability to stop bad behavior instantly now that our daughter is conditioned to it. We’ve also put a damper on whining with: “I hear you when your voice sounds big like an adult instead of whiney. A whiney voice sounds like ‘I waaaant it. Give it to meeeee! A big voice sounds like, ‘Daddy, may I please have this?’ I hear big voices, not whiney voices.” The techniques we learned in your class make so much sense, but we never would have thought of them on our own. It makes so much sense to shift from threats and warnings to the principles of Love and Logic that try to make life at home as similar as possible to life in the real world. The Love and Logic techniques have de-stressed our lives because now we’re learning the specifics of what to do and how to do it. We have a lot more to learn but at least now we have the specific lessons of the Love and Logic framework to learn from.
Thank you for changing our lives.
Cate and Joseph
Menlo Park, CA